Bawdy Language

Kids often discover that they have bodies at a very early age. A lot of these discoveries are made in the bath tub, though some children like to wait for less opportune times...like when their parents are throwing a dinner party for the neighbours.

'Mommy, daddy...look what I've got!'

This is a hypothetical example and did not happen to me or anyone related to me. Honest. That's my disclaimer, though I do have a doozy of a story that I may one day write about. I'll have to speak to my lawyer to see if I can be sued by telling the tale. It involves a great big giant p___, well, never mind.

We discover our bodies early and then forget about them for a long time. Usually. Some people have no idea how their bodies, and actions, affect others. I'm not taking about the Peewee Hermans of the world...just the average Joes.

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I was sitting around the other evening, with a bunch of windsurfers, enjoying a glass of wine and a spectacular sunset. There were no clouds, just a burning ball slipping below a watery horizon. In the midground two kiteboarders squeezed what they could out of the remaining wind. The breeze gave a slight chill to the air, making us appreciative of what sunlight we could harvest. A truck pulled into the lagoon parking lot, no doubt hoping to share the sunset with us.

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Houston, we have a problem.

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Amazingly, the driver of the monstrous four door truck parked his big fat metal ass smack in between our little party and the sun. We were instantly cast into shadow. I laughed out loud at the truck driver's insensitivity. Sometimes you just have to chuckle, for there rest of the time there's sabotage. Humans are funny, even when they're not. I did what most polite Canadians would have done...nothing. One of our more spirited posse asked truck man to move, which he did. Problem solved.

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I poured myself more wine and carried on thinking about my sun.