Saturday, May 23, 2009

Jack Johnson BWO (Better Watch Out)

I'm standing in a parking lot in Saint John, half naked, when I think that there must be more to life than this...that's when I finally ask the question that has been burning in my mind for a long time:


What Would Jack Johnson Do?

I know exactly what Jack Johnson would do. He'd finish taking off his wetsuit after a great (wind) surfing session. Standing in that parking lot, he'd discretely remove his wetsuit and towel himself dry. He'd then put on his clothes, grab his guitar and head back to the water's edge for an impromptu concert. His friends would gather around and, of course, there'd be a spectacular sunset.


What Does Ian Varty Do?

Like JayJay, I take off my wetsuit, then I pile my gear into my car and drive off into the sunset.

So who would you rather be? Jack Johnson or Ian Varty?

Let's look at the facts: Jack Johnson is an award winning musician. He's handsome in a non-simian Ben Stiller kind of way. He's more than able to pay his property taxes and he grew up on the North Shore of Oahu, where sunsets are legislated to happen. Jack is also an exceptionally talented surfer, at age 17 becoming the youngest competitor to make the surfing finals at Pipeline.

Ian Varty has a bad back and wheezes a lot lately.

Tough decision.

I wouldn't want Jack Johnson to feel hurt, so please keep your answers to yourselves. Ha! I'm not easily offended, so the truth doesn't hurt all that much. I could wallow in my own misery, and wheeze, or I could do something about it. I've chosen the latter.

For ten years a guitar has sat silently in my home, living the life of a Prairie surfboard...unused, unloved, yet worthy of the occasional glance of longing. Visually the guitar is an object of beauty with it's graceful curves and warmly grained veneer, even if it has a pencil neck and pear-shaped bottom. Like a tethered sailboat, my guitar was full of latent possibility and adventure. So one day I picked it up and started playing.


Jack Johnson Has Nothing To Worry About. I'll never show up on Sunset Beach and out-strum him, just like I'll never snake his wave at Pipeline. Musically, some people just have 'it'. Me? I can only be me. The guitar is more challenging than anything I've wrestled with in this life, even getting my wetsuit gracefully off in public. Will I extricate myself from the clutches of my neoprene suit, grab my guitar and head back to the water's edge? Or will I fall on my face, wriggling and wheezing half naked in the parking lot?

It could go either way.

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