Thursday, December 24, 2009

The Christmas Card: Creation Or Evolution?

Every year I create a Christmas card to send to friends and family. It feels like a more personal way to say Merry Christmas, when I can't say it in person.

You mean because you're too cheap to pay for a long distance phone call.

Not true. If you were in Antarctica, I would call you.

Call me what?

I'd call you on the telephone. In fact, I'm going to suggest that you go there right now so I can prove that I'm not scared to make long distance telephone calls. I'd offer to help pack your bags, but they're already packed. You seem to carry a lot of baggage around with you and I'm not sure there's room for any more.

Ha ha. Point made. Ian: one, Alter Ego: zero. You win.

I really enjoy creating the cards. That's why I do it...for the joy of creating. You might say that I'm a creationist.

I like creating cards so much that I decided to create a 'Christmas in July' card, but it never got sent. The NRA threatened to sue me, because they, too, were thinking of marketing a similar card. The law suit was settled in the Oromocto courthouse in early September, too late to use the card this year. I won the case, but I took a bullet in the leg for my troubles. I'm not sure, but I thought I saw Charlton Heston's widow on the six floor of the Oromocto School Book Depository building.

I started creating the cards in 2002, but sadly my first two cards have gone missing from my archives. In 2002 we dressed up like the Osbournes. Me with a leopard skin shirt and Wendy having her ass plumped up by a pillow. There were other props, including Julian. Our 2003 card had us masquerading as body builders (not much Photoshop magic needed for me!).

I was able to find our cards from 2004 to 2008. You'll see them below and you can click on them if you wish to see them in a larger format. It's fun to see how the cards have evolved over the years. And they have. You might say that I'm an evolutionist.

Merry Christmas. Happy Holy Days. Happy Hanukkah. Rockin' Ramadan. Joyeux Noel. Seasons Greetings, or if you play Scrabble against me, Season's Beatings.

Whatever your religion, colour, beliefs, persuasion, etc...blah, blah, blah...enjoy your time with family and friends.

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